Panic wakes me from sleep at one A.M.
I walk down the street to clear my head and realize I have not eaten since Sunday. The grocery store is 24 hours, I pick up a box of corndogs because they are filling, cheap and come 20 to a box. As I stand at the check out, my heart begins to race. "Don't spend any money!!" one of the voices in my head cries out. Another voice says "We need to eat."
So my fragmented personality does battle with itself.... and I feel reality slip through my fingers. From the corner of my field of vision inward, blackness like water spills.... and then nothing for what seems to be hours. My brain just shut itself down, leaving my body stranded in a grocery store.
Suddenly I was back. Worried people look at me like I have just crapped myself (which I didn't). I force a grin, pay for my food and make a hasty exit...... worried that I am that mental. Unsure of how long I was in the dark.... unsure what I did or said in that time.... scared that this damaged person is me.